


Damnation and Dark Desires

by sidana



Series: Richard's Damnation [2]
Category: Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter - Laurell K. Hamilton
Genre: BDSM, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 16:00:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16478591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidana/pseuds/sidana
Summary: Asher pushes Richard into action as his unmet needs threaten to destabilize the triunvirate





	Damnation and Dark Desires

disclaimer: not my characters, not my universe. I'll put everyone back where I found them when I'm done playing with them

********************

 

Richard could blame it all on Asher. He was the one that had all but forcibly shoved him along that particular pathway. There had to be someone who was at fault for the whole thing. And Asher was the one who had brought Nathaniel to the party, or more precisely, to what had been supposed to be an otherwise ordinary meeting among Jean-Claude, Asher, and Faust. Richard had done his best to stay focused during the discussion of the details of the partnership between his wolves and Jean-Claude's vampires, but it had taken every ounce of control.

Then the meeting ended. Jean-Claude and Faust left the conference room quickly, and Richard started to follow.

"Wait," Asher said firmly. He hadn't risen from the table yet because he hadn't managed to untangle himself from Nathaniel, who still knelt at his side, his face resting against Asher's knee.

"I've got to be at work early tomorrow, and I need more than five hours of sleep a night these days," he said as Nathaniel and Asher stood up.

"Surely you have a few more minutes so we can talk about another matter of importance,"

"I guess," he conceded. Provided that the view didn't distract him too much from other conversation. Nathaniel was flaunting everything that night. He had drawn his hair back into a tight braid so he couldn't hide the rest of himself behind it. The g-string that was his only clothing was a dark brown that matched the leather ties that wrapped his arms behind him from elbow to wrist. Around his neck, he wore more than a dozen thin silver necklaces, the chains leaving narrow trails of red in places where that had lingered against Nathaniel's skin for too long.

"It is a talk about needs that should have happened long ago, and it begins thus," Asher said as he moved closer to Nathaniel. Before Richard could ask him to clarify, Asher grabbed Nathaniel by the braid with one hand, and pushed his back with the other, positioning him so that he was leaning face down on the conference table. The chains jingled briefly as they pooled around flesh and hit the wood.

"And thus," Asher continued as his hands released Nathaniel with a vampire's quickness. He drew his left hand back, and slapped down hard enough on Nathaniel's bare ass that the sound seemed to echo around the room.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Richard snapped as he grabbed at Asher's hand to keep him from doing that again.

"Inviting you to join me," Asher said simply.

After a meeting spent knowing that Nathaniel was there, but not daring to look at him, Richard's control was frayed enough that it snapped at the moment. He tried to let go of Asher in order to gain position for a fight, but the other man managed to keep a grip on him. So he was left taking an off-balance swing that he hoped would manage to avoid Nathaniel and connect with Asher all the while he was trying to work around the table and Nathaniel's legs.

It didn't quite work, and he found himself trying to frantically correct his balance and he brought his free hand up for another punch. But just as he managed another off balance swing at Asher, Asher stepped toward him instead of away from him, using his feet to sweep Richard's own feet out from under him. He got his own grip on Asher again as he fell, at least managing to take the other man down with him. But unfortunately, Asher managed to control the situation as they tried to roll on top of and pin each other, and he ended up with his back against the floor as Asher straddled his waist.

"You've got me. Now what are you going to do with me?" He managed to still sound reasonably human for all that he wanted nothing more than at the moment to let the wolf slip out from under his skin and try to tear Asher's throat out.

"Wait for you to calm down enough that you can discuss things as a person and not as a beast."

He was alpha. That meant he had control over himself under every circumstance. Very carefully he locked away the wolf and most of the rage until he felt like he could carry on a conversation with the other man.

"So now what? You've got me where you want me," he said bitterness in his voice. "And you're enjoying it way too much. I can certainly feel that from you."

"Nathaniel, you may leave now." Richard got a glimpse of bare legs walking away from the table followed by the sound of Nathaniel's bound hands scrambling for the doorknob. Asher waited until the door to the conference room closed before he spoke again. "Tell me you wouldn't be enjoying this just as much if you were the one who was on top of me."

"I wouldn't," he said as he slid his knees up in an attempt to get some leverage off the floor with his feet. Maybe he could get Asher off him if he surprised him with a backward roll.

"Yes, you would. You may still deny it in yourself, but for someone who has spent centuries in Belle's court, it is obvious. I learned long, long ago how to read the needs of others in order to exploit them to the fullest. And there are far more ways that a wolf's nose to detect what effect Nathaniel had on you tonight. You wanted him, wanted to master him."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes. And this is not the way to continue the conversation. What you have is a great opportunity."

"What I have here is a problem I can never solve. Nothing can ever happen between the two of us, ever." The effective admission that there was attraction spilled out of him. It made him feel dirty, and also, to his surprise, a little bit relieved.

"This, this is not an ideal way to hold a conversation," Asher said almost with a sigh. "If I let you up, would you join me at the table under a flag of truce?"

"I can do that," he managed. What he wanted to do was to walk out of the room, and pretend none of this had happened. But he knew that if he did, Asher would keep pressing his point, and next time there might be more witnesses.

"Then get up," Asher said as he got off him with almost the grace of another wolf. Richard was relieved that he didn't feel the need to offer him a hand up. That would have been far too awkward.

"So, what the hell was that all about?" he asked as he settled into the soft black leather chair.

"It is about putting the affairs of one's house in order before we all get drawn into the war with the Mother. I can easily understand why Jean was so drawn to Anita. Her charms and heart are limitless. Sometimes, I can even see what he saw in you. There is the potential for such power. But as it stands right now, both of you could be the cause of the death of one I love dearly, and I feel I must act in order to protect him."

"I'm sorry about what happened in the church. You know I've been trying to find a way to make amends since then." He just still wasn't quite sure how, since nothing seemed good enough.

"Right now, it's not about what you do. It's about who you fundamentally are, and who Anita fundamentally is. It is also about who Nathaniel fundamentally is. All three of you are tied to Jean, and to each other. You already know that the Mother looks to find ways of weakening you by finding out what can drive you into conflict with each other. And if the Mother does not kill us all, you could be tied to each other for a very long time, even if Anita does not take the final mark from Jean. "

"I hadn't really thought about that." He had always thought in the short term in recent years. It was about what happened until the end of the semester or the next full moon or the next challenge of his authority.

"And I have had much time to think about such matters. I have seen how both joy can grow and how rage can simmer if you give it forty or sixty years to do so. With the five of you, it could be even longer than that."

"And what does this have to do with, with Nathaniel?"

"It is because of how Nathaniel's relationship with Anita has progressed in recent weeks."

"I'm not following you here."

"For the sake of Jean, I will refrain from calling you dense now. But for all that you have far better senses than any human, have you not seen what has progressed between them?"

"That Anita, Nathaniel, and you have been..." He couldn't finish the sentence, hating to have to discuss what Anita had ended up doing with her life.

"Working with Anita to help teach her how to meet Nathaniel's needs. And for all that Anita has seen in recent years, there were some places where she was still very much an innocent indeed. Unlike Nathaniel or I. Unlike you."

"I never did anything to Nathaniel."

"As I said before, it is not a matter of what you have or have not done. It is a matter of who you fundamentally are. And in that regard, you are much more like us than you are like her."

"No. I'm not."

"I can say that you are fast approaching a time when denial in that area will be a luxury you can no longer afford. But others have said that many a time to you, and you have still not been able to come to terms with yourself. So maybe you will listen better when I ask you to consider things for Anita's sake."

"So what do you mean by that?" Anita was one of those people he owed amends to, and he was coming to think that it was a debt that started the day he had dragged her into the world of werewolf politics. And he had kept pushing a part of her further and further into the darkness for all that he had wanted to figure out a way of keeping her safe and out of the mess.

"When Anita comes to me for lessons in how to please Nathaniel, there is not joy in her eyes, only a deep sense of obligation. When she strikes at him or binds him down, it is only for his sake and not her own. Like many women, she likes intercourse a bit rougher than most women would admit. But she lacks the deep need to cause or accept pain that he feels. And over time, I worry that what Nathaniel needs will become a resented chore for her, and that kind of resentment is an emotion that can weaken her ties to Jean when the five of you need most to stand united and unbreakable."

"So what am I supposed to do? I'm not going to fuck Nathaniel. I'm not gay." With Asher's words, he had had one more reason why he had helped turn Anita into a less than good person thrown in his face. If it hadn't been for him she never would have gotten tangled up in the mess of the pard.

"As the term is used, no. You enjoy the company of women far too much. But you do enjoy the pain of others. And you are intrigued by Nathaniel. That you cannot deny."

"I've never touched him that way. I've never played those games with him."

"But when both of you were with Raina, you got pleasure out of watching others abuse him."

"I was there to make sure that no one took it too far with him. I didn't like him, but he didn't know how to keep people from going too far, so someone had to."

"He said that you served that function when Raina and Gabriel were with him."

"Great, he remembers that." Richard put his face down in his hands as he started to feel his whole world go crashing down around him again.

"He always has. But he had no wish to bring it up again because he feared your anger if he did. It was only when I suggested you might be able to meet his needs and be happier about it than Anita is that he discussed that time spent with Raina."

"And that needs to go no further than you and the people directly tied to Anita. The pack is very traditional in some ways. For all that it didn't matter who Raina slept with, or that Sylvie and Gwen are together, being gay is seen as a weakness to be exploited if you're a male Ulfric. And I'm not gay."

"Non. But you cannot deny that it is more than just ordinary women that you are drawn to."

"Even though I know what my reputation is, I don't go screwing every woman I find attractive. And I'm not going to screw Nathaniel either, even if it does have to do with Anita. It seems like that's what you are suggesting, and, believe it or not, there are still a few line in my life that I can't and won't cross."

"Americans," Asher said with almost a snort. "Once more it comes back to what your perceptions of different types of intimacy are. While it can be sublime to combine sex and pain together, it does not always have to be so. I spent centuries of my life only able to draw enjoyment from the pain without being able to indulge in intercourse or oral pleasure. You do not need to have sex with Nathaniel to meet his needs for pain or your own. And as for what your comrades think, I have seen enough wolf packs through my years, and I can say that few wolves do take exception to an alpha enjoying disciplining a lesser pack member if they feel that the punishment is a fair one."

"But I never..."

"At this point, feel free to lie to me if you want. But the time has come to stop lying to yourself. I know I'll neither be the first nor the last person to tell you that. But for Jean's sake, I hope that because I have been where you stand that I am the one who can get the message through your overly thick skull. Think, and think honestly about what I have said here. Because as it is now, you are becoming more and more of a weakness to Jean that I can already see his enemies circling to exploit. And now I must go to finish attending to Nathaniel. And you are welcome to join us at any time."

"No. I definitely will not." But for all that he denied it, he just couldn't say never anymore. Asher was the devil, and for all that he was trying to stay good, the devil knew just which offers to make that would tempt him the most.

******************

It wasn't in the dark but in the light that everything came to a head two weeks after Asher had confronted him. He had spent Friday night at Anita's, and the dark hours sleeping in a shared bed with not only her but Micah and Nathaniel as well. Now Micah got up to attend some sort of Coalition meeting, and the rest of them shifted around in the bed to make better use of the space he left behind. Richard found himself spooned around Nathaniel fumbling as he tried to figure out where to put his hands and arms. If Nathaniel had been one of his wolves, he would have just known how everything was supposed to fit together. It was one of the ways that the subtle magic that tied the pack together worked, and he relied on that when he found himself in bed with another male wolf. Without that, it became much harder.

He tried to reach around Nathaniel's shoulder in order to feel Anita as well. But as he did, his hand got tangled up in Nathaniel's messy braid. In response, the mostly asleep Nathaniel pulled his head away from Richard until the braid went taut while at the same time pressing his hips back toward Richard. Nathaniels' actions were unmistakable. Even as he dozed, he still craved that kind of hard or tight contact. Before he could stop himself, Richard pulled the braid even tighter, and he was rewarded with Nathaniel's ass pressing tighter against his groin. Sex was a part of the movement, but it was a small part of the way Nathaniel's mind mixed the concepts of restraint with a sense of safety. For all that Richard had threatened Nathaniel more than once, and had verbally abused him many other times, when the chips were down, he had tried to keep Nathaniel safe from permanent damage from Gabriel and Raina.

He heard the bathroom door open, and Richard froze his movements as Micah reappeared in the bedroom. The other man bent down to briefly kiss Anita, lips brushing against lips. If he had noticed what was going on between Richard and Nathaniel, he ignored it. Shapeshifter manners. If there was an outright orgy going on three feet away from you, you looked past it unless you were invited to participate. And Micah was the perfect lycanthrope. He wouldn't have anything less than perfect manners in that regard either.

Micah was also perfect in the sense that he had never seemed to be interested in pain like Richard was either. Not that Micah would have directly offered up that part of information about himself. He didn't talk much about himself in general, a perfect and bland mask always in place. But if Micah did have it in him to want to play the same games Nathaniel liked, something would have happened between the two leopards long ago, if only to spare Anita in that regard.

Without moving or even opening his eyes, Richard followed Micah's movements are he went from bedroom to kitchen to garage. The garage door opened and closed, and he heard Micah's car fade down the country road.

As it did, he found himself relaxing just a little bit. And letting himself enjoy the feel of Nathaniel's body pressed against him, skin on skin until the point where Nathaniel's head pulled away from him. As Anita slid back into a quiet snore, Richard used Nathaniel's hair like a winch to draw his head even closer to his own. He was rewarded with a small purr as Nathaniel pulled at his hair even harder. Nathaniel obviously liked it, and Richard was forced to admit that it felt good for him too. Was this really that bad? It was hardly like he was hauling the kid into one of Narcissus' rooms to do God-knows-what. It was only holding onto him with one hand. As the numbers on the clock clicked away thirty-three minutes, he carefully gave himself permission to enjoy the sensation. He was caught up in so many different layers of preternatural shit these days, caught up in so many layers of lies in order to keep his job. Just for once, it was nice to get to feel like he was in control and curled around someone who truly would do whatever he asked him to do and not try to argue with him or give him lip about it like his wolves always seemed to.

And then Anita woke up, rolling around to give Nathaniel a kiss. He felt Nathaniel strain even more against his grip to the point where it had to hurt his scalp for him to reach Anita's lips. Control. For all the times Nathaniel had come between him and Anita, it was nice to make him have to pay a price for it this time. Everything should have a price, after all.

"Do I get one too?" he asked, continuing to pull Nathaniel's head back as he moved his own forward.

"Maybe," she said before giving him the briefest brush against his lips.

"That's all?"

"It's not your turn," she said, all the while he could smell her growing arousal. Smell Nathaniel's growing arousal as well.

"You and the damn schedule on the fridge," he grumbled. The schedule that said Saturday morning was Nathaniel's turn. The schedule that would normally signal that he was now supposed to quietly let go of Nathaniel and slip into the shower to ignore what was going on between Nathaniel and Anita.

But he didn't want to let go of the other man, not yet.

"It's not perfect, but it's the best I've been able to do," Anita said, a mix of tiredness and tenderness in her voice as she gently ran a hand down Nathaniel's chest.

He felt Nathaniel buck at his grip in response to Anita's touch. It made Richard want to grab hold of him somewhere else to keep him from moving more.

"Hot water tanks' probably topped off again after Micah," she said, urging him away so she could continue with Nathaniel.

"I don't think I want to go," he managed to say one step above a whisper.

"Richard, I don't know what game you're playing," Anita started.

"But I do," Nathaniel said, speaking for the first time. "And I want it, and I don't want either of you to say anything about it right now because it gets screwed up when the two of you talk. Anita, please."

It was the please that got to Anita. She would do anything for her boy toy. For all the bluster, she would do anything for people she cared about, even letting Richard force her into the role of Bolverk so he didn't have to have so much blood on his own hands. He had called her evil, but there had been so much of it that had come because of what he had asked of her. Time to take some of that back into himself since he was already damned too anyways.

Damned because he had watched Nathaniel so many times and was now willing to admit himself that he wanted to do so much more than watch. And with Anita there, she could take the sex part of it all and leave him only with the pain.

"It's no game. I'm trying to come to terms with myself here."

"Anita, no talk, please" the plea came from Nathaniel as Richard smelled the other man's arousal swell. Smart boy. If they started talking, there would be no doing.

"It's probably too much to ask, but no regrets. No hating you, me, or Nathaniel afterwards."

"I'll try," he said. It was all he could do.

With that, she kissed Nathaniel again, her lips moving from Nathaniel's lips to his cheek and down along his neck and collar bone. She nipped along his shoulder, and Nathaniel shuddered.

"Too much moving there. And sit up so she can reach you better," he said, tightening his grip on Nathaniel's hair . With his free hand, he grabbed Nathaniel's arm, pulling it into a wrestler's or cop's control hold behind him, feeling free to pull the arm until it felt like it was nearly coming out of the socket. Nathaniel was so flexible there, after all. With a more secure grip on the other man, he pulled both of them onto their knees on the bed.

"Now no moving from this point as she gets to do whatever she wants to you. However because you've been good so far this morning, you can come whenever you want to."

He could feel Nathaniel purr a little again, for all that he couldn't open his mouth to speak. And then Anita moved between Nathaniel's legs to strip his shorts off and begin to work her own magic on Nathaniel's aroused cock, and he went still.

Or at least for the first few moments. Anita was good with her mouth, and wouldn't think of doing anything less than her best for her boy toy. So Richard found himself forced to start correcting Nathaniel as the other man failed to stop his movement under Anita's touch. Richard pulled on the other man's arm harder until it was almost dislocated, and the hand holding the braid pulled back tighter, the nails of his hand sinking into Nathaniel's shoulder as they sharply anchored into his skin. He could feel the deep level of satisfaction as Nathaniel responded to each correction. For all that he was in the middle of sex, he was still submitting to Richard, still giving him control of the whole process. It felt right for the wolf that at some level wanted everyone around him to fit neatly into the power hierarchy. It felt so good to finally be able to master someone he had never dared to touch that way before, to hold him back and force him into a role for the sole reason that Richard wanted him to do something, to be able to push and pull and claw and to only be met with a non-verbal request to make it harder and harder. He felt himself start to grow hard as Anita continued.

And then Nathaniel gave up all premise of trying not to move as his hips buckled and his cock slid harder into Anita's mouth, his breath gasping as he came. As he finished, he sagged against Richard, catching his breath as he did.

"Thank you, both of you. That was good for me," Nathaniel said as he gathered himself up and off the bed, politely ignoring the way Richard's cock was now pressing along the line of his butt.

"You were moving too much at the end," Richard said, the rush of sensations he still felt making him feel a little bit reckless. He reached out, and swatted Nathaniel hard on the butt before he could cover everything up with the running shorts again.

"I'm sorry," Nathaniel said, the tone of his voice making clear that he was anything but that.

"If you're really sorry, you can make us breakfast," he said giving Nathaniel one more swat.

"I'll do that," Nathaniel said. There was joy in his eyes as he almost bounced from the room even more hair coming out of the now very tangled braid.

"Richard," Anita started.

"Does he look unhappy about that?"

"It's not about happy. It's about you ordering him around."

"He knows how to say no now, so if he doesn't want to make pancakes, it's not like he has to make damn pancakes. And it's not like I'd ask him to do something he wouldn't want to do, not with you right on the other side of me. He liked it like I like it. You're always saying that I need to accept all of myself. Maybe it's a start here."

"Maybe it is," Anita said carefully. Only someone who knew her well could see the little bit of relief that briefly flickered across her face.

"And he looked happy at the end there," he said. The adrenaline was fading, and he needed to reassure himself of that as much as he needed to reassure her.

"He did." Anita said, more thoughts crossing her face. "And it wasn't like I, wasn't like... it was something I can live with."

Part of him wanted to ask her what she meant by that, to confirm what Asher had suspected. But the rest of him wanted to avoid that topic, to avoid having to talk about what had happened in general because if they talked more now, it would probably end up as badly as it always did when they tried to talk these days. And he was still hard, and she had looked so beautiful when she had gone to work on Nathaniel. So instead of talking, he went to touch her, his fingers brushing against her very erect nipples. For all that she had enjoyed her time with Nathaniel, she hadn't gotten any real relief from it, and he had other unmet needs himself.

"No more talking until after breakfast?" he offered.

"There's some time until Nathaniel gets everything ready," she started.

"But there are so many other things we can do with our mouths where we wouldn't end up getting mad at each other. We're probably both emotionally fragile right now." Funny how it was easier to talk about his own weaknesses when he had so recently confirmed his other strengths.

"Okay," she said carefully.

With that, he moved his hands from her nipples to her already swollen clit. He wasn't sure what the future held, or how he would feel about that morning when he thought about it later on. But he did know that if Anita could still feel like she could make love to him after the way he had manhandled Nathaniel in front of her, maybe it would be the first step in making it all okay somehow.


End file.
